The Mother Ship

 My Father had a remarkable Lightness of Being.

Even now, in the absence of his physical presence, his Light is calming and present within me. He was the incarnation and embodiment of ‘All is Well’, ‘Life is Good’ and ‘Be not Afraid’.

You might think that his suicide surprised me. For how could the Sunlight ever choose to leave the Sky? But I understood the paradox, the mystery and the pathway that led him through that doorway.

He had been Captain for so long and for so many. He had led the way, paved the way and become the way of what safe passage would forever feel like and for always be. He was steadfast and certain, calm and trusting and deeply unassuming. He knew that he controlled the ship through his union with and intimate knowing of it. He knew as well, that he did not control the Waters, or the limitations of the Vessel in which he sailed.

The cracks formed slowly at first, until the force and pressure and pain caused the Vessel to burst. The mounting currents of time and weather, the conditions and patterns of new alignments, the tumultuous rivers of change all converged on the horizon. His compass folded inward. He navigated Home. Through the pathway of least resistance, in an honest effort to do no harm, he went down with his ship.

My Mother’s recent heart attack occurred while I was in surgery. To restore my Vision.

I hope I can See things more clearly now.  I Pray I will know The Way.  My Perspective Clear.  Free of shadow and fear.

Since the first time that I met her, my Mother has been shipwrecked. Lost and tossed about and flailing darkly through the somber Sea.  Unsure of anything. Not feeling Worthy. Desperate to find her way towards wholeness that would start her heart to fully breathe. Seeking permission for her right to simply Be.

She has misunderstood why the journey is wrapped in deep mystery, meant to enlighten, and never to frighten.

She has misunderstood that the Waters that hold her would not hold her hostage. Accuse her or bruise her. Deny or refuse her. 

She has simply forgotten that the Waters of Life are the birthing canals that transform us and flow us back into ourselves.

I am praying to teach her the things I have learned that may help her to steady her ship in these shape shifting Seas.

 I am hoping to silently whisper to her. Navigational Alchemy. Anchoring soothingly. Anchoring Soul into all that she Sees.  

I will start with these words that now form my Refrain:

“All is Well.”

“Life is Good.”

And, Please, “Be Not Afraid.”

I will add:

You are Loved, more than words can explain. 

For You Are Love, and As Love, You’ll Always Remain.



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